Psychiatric Terrorism

I mentioned that Anita and I both believed that by signing the deposition, my captors would be appeased. However, deep down I knew that my captors were driven by an insane obsessive hatred that could not be satisfied. It is the same insane obsessive hatred that caused Hitler to want to exterminate the Jews. And by blaming me for the failure of their stupid plans to rig a trial, my captors could rationalize their insanity because my Nazi captors had a perfect scapegoat - a defenseless slave. Remember that Hitler rationalized that the Jews were the source of all of Germany's problems. And just as Hitler tried to destroy the Jews, I knew my Nazi captors would not be happy until they had destroyed me.

Another unusual thing about my time at Daniels House was that none of the doctors or staff ever even bothered to ask me what had happened to me; they automatically treated me as though I was paranoid. A one point one of the resident psychiatrists, Dr. Luther said, "You know, you are much to trusting to be paranoid." I wanted to ask him why he thought I was like that, but any attempt to have a rational conversation about my situation was futile. I sat there quietly and kept my mouth shut.

One nurse did ask me why I slept so much. I told her that I was so heavily drugged, that I couldn't stay awake. She said she would check on my "medications". The next day I was informed that my "medications" would be reduced. The reduction in the dosages came after I had signed my deposition.

The day of my release hearing was approaching and I decided my best chance for release and a peaceful life was to go in and say how sick I had been, and that now I recognized how badly I needed help and to acknowledge all the fine help I had received at Daniels House. Several years later I saw the movie "Francis" and my role at the release hearing and the doctor's responses were almost identical to the release hearing portrayed in that movie. In the movie, Jessica Lange who portrays Francis Farmer, rehearses a humble, contrite speech where she confesses that she had been sick and thanks the doctors for their help in order to gain her release. Sitting there at the release hearing and admitting I had been mentally ill when there was rational evidence that I had been terrorized was very difficult to do, but I wanted to be released so desperately that I would have said anything. The whole process is nothing more that forcing a prisoner to be obsequious to those in power. Finally, on January 22nd, some thirty four days after I had been "voluntarily" admitted to the institution, I was released.

It is interesting to note, that the release hearing was recorded and the whole charade amounted to little more than the people in power covering their asses against any future lawsuit. After all, the victim, I mean patient did confess to his illness. As I said in an earlier post, most psychiatists should be tried for crimes against humanity and then executed.