Still some want the world to bow to them!

"For what is a man profited if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul?"
Matthew 16:25-26.

The ruling Nazis may go to church and align themselves with Christianity, but there is no way these people are true Christians.

On January 5, 1981 I returned to work. The RAM medical department approved the plan Dr. Padua submitted which called for my working four hours a day for one week followed by a week at six hours a day before I returned to a normal work day. It really didn't matter. After 5 years of brutal mental torture, I would have needed a year of rest to regain my mental and physical health. I was mentally in very bad shape and my only concern on returning to work was that there would be no more harassment. My mental state was very so delicate that I felt any more torture would cause a complete collapse, breakdown or suicide. I came into work and hung my coat and hat on the wall hanger and then went into the laboratory to check the condition of my lab equipment. About an hour later I returned to my office to find my coat on the floor. My hat was still on the wall hook and since the hanger was a single hook, it was impossible for the coat to fall off the hook with the hat hanging over it. I started to tremble and cry. I put on my coat and hat and rushed out of the building to my car and drove home. When I got home, Anita was there and I tried to tell her what had happened, but I was so upset that I wasn't very coherent. Finally, when I was able to get my composure, I told her what had happened. At first she tried to rationalize the incident as an accident, but she quickly realized how absurd her arguments were and then she tried to comfort me. I remained home the rest of the day.

The next day I went into work with greater apprehension. As I walked into the office, there standing in the middle of the room blocking everything was a free-standing coat rack. I quickly took the coat rack and carried it to an adjacent office where I deposited it. I then went back to my desk to try to do some work, but that one incident had ruined my day.

For the next couple of months I remained very depressed and did very little work. The side effects of the medication I was taking were becoming intolerable. One day at work I experienced a minor convulsion similar to the one I had experienced in the hospital. At that point I decided to stop taking the Stelazine medication. The fact that I was on Stelazine the first time when I was terrorized into attempting suicide told me that the medication was useless as long as the external stimuli was there.

The antidepressant I was taking was causing blurry vision and severe constipation. Thus I also quit taking that medication. I believed if the terrorism/mental torture ever stopped and I could find a doctor who really wanted to help me, I would take the appropriate medication.