Failing health and no job.

Current events:  What kind of people would lack the common sense and wisdom and schedule a large convention in Florida in late August?  Ans:  The same people who have created a failing fascist, barbaric system.

As a result of ten years of brutal mental/psychological torture, my physical health could not deal with the rigors of working full-time.  As my physical health continued to deteriorate, I had to take repeated rest breaks at work.  I would be working in the laboratory and I would become so fatigued that I had to go back to my office and sit down.  At times I had trouble staying awake.  It was obvious that if I continued to try to do a good job, my health would eventually fail me in some way.

Of course I was still being subjected to daily doses of harassment and the owner, Dr. Jon played a bigger and more active role in the orchestrated events.  For example, Dr. Jon had scheduled a meeting in his office around noon, three of four days in a row.  Finally, on the day I took my car in for repairs and had asked a co-worker for a ride to the shop late in the afternoon, Dr. Jon decides to schedule a meeting for 4:15 PM.  While the two actions may appear coincidental, it was a continuing repeat of creating conflicting interests and/or meetings that began with Gamma Supplies and continued at RAM.  You can go back and read about how an emergency meeting was called at RAM on the morning of my house closing.  This was a classic "no win situation" or as psychologists call it, "a psychological double-bind".

At first I wasn't too worried because Dr. Jon's meetings were usually short and the garage which closed at 5:00 PM was not far away(Rolla is a small town physically as well as mentally).  Four of us gathered in the conference room and Dr. Jon started discussions on any and every thing under the sun.  At first I thought maybe he was just trying to be a good manager by showing interests in different areas of science and non-science topics, but after about fifteen minutes, it became obvious, the he was just dragging out the meeting.  Finally, at 4:55 PM, I interrupted him and said I had to leave to pick up my car before the garage closed where my car was being repaired.  Dr. Jon acted annoyed and then dismissed the group.  I made it to the garage just as they were closing the doors - I got my car.

While my concerns about my physical health continued to grow, they were totally unwarranted.  Several days after the car/meeting incident, Dr. Jon came into my office and said he wanted to speak to me in his office.  His approach was the same as the one he had used a week earlier when he told me he wanted a monthly plan from me and then totally ignored my efforts when I handed it in to him.  I immediately became suspicious and wondered if I was going to be fired as we walked toward his office.   Once in his office, Dr. Jon wasted little time in saying "things weren't working out and that he "had made a mistake".  He then told me to pack my personal belongings in a box and then he would escort me to the door.

With that I got up form the chair, walked to my office and handed Dr. Jon a copy of a letter I was going to send to Rambo Raygun(Ronald Reagan) when I got fired.  Obviously I was prepared.  I then walked halfway down the hall and read the letter aloud.  Several employees in their offices came out to the hallway and listened intently.  When I completed reading the letter, I returned to my office and began packing my personal items.  Dr. Jon said nothing; he was like many other people before him in that it was probably the first time he had seen what a really sick fascist state amerika is.

Limit income and create expenses = a life of poverty

Apparently I am getting to information that The Crazies and the fascist state really do not want you to know.  I recently discovered that key pages from my manuscript are missing and an official court document which was about the only proof left of what the sick bastards did and still do to me was removed from my apartment within the last year.  Without my copy of the court document, The crazies can now alter or remove the last official document of what was done to me and the delete the names of the Nazi sympathizers/perpetrators.  But stick around because I will definetly tell you how the sick bastards of this fascist state operate.

Continuing With My Story:

With my first couple of paychecks, the first in two years, I had much need repairs done on my car.  Tampering with my car had always been a favorite fascist state technique and I never knew for sure if a mechanical problem was normal or caused by tampering.  This is typical for a political prisoner since never being able to tell what is “real” and what is “fabricated” is a standard gestapo procedure in making a person look crazy.  For a refresher on this technique go back to the blog where I described the experiments done on dogs – is it an oval or an elipse?

The problems with my car were becoming more serious and although I was reluctant to make an appointment, I finally took my car to a local dealer.  I expected the fascist state to have the mechanics act incompetent and then have me repeatedly take the car back into the shop to have the same problem repaired again.  Once when I was at RAM, I had to take my car back five times to the dealer where I had bought the car in an attempt to get a minor problem fixed.  In that case, I ended up repairing the car myself.  You can imagine my surprise when I went back this time to pick up my car and found the work had been completed.  I couldn’t believe things had gone smoothly

My joy was short lived.  As I drove back to my apartment, the car overheated as badly as ever.  I had spent over one hundred and sixty dollars(1986) for services on my car and the problem was as bad as ever.  If the mechanic had taken a five minute test drive, he would have known the overheating problem still existed. That weekend, I replaced the thermostat and flushed the radiator to correct the problem.

A common fascist state procedure is to keep their torture victims poor.  Without money a person is removed from society.  The first step to keep me poor was to terrorize me to the point that I couldn’t work and if you are not from a wealthy family, you must work to have money.  Second, The Crazies constantly created expenses by tampering with my car, stealing personal items from my apartment and as you will see soon, by creating expenses through situations that they created through lies and manipulation.

Harassment From the Top

The owner of the company had pretty much remained distant from the harassment I was being subjected to at work until the middle of the following week. The owner called me into his office around ten thirty and said he wanted me to draw up a monthly plan for the coming month of August. He went on to explain how I would progress to a six month plan and then to a one year plan at some future date. There was nothing unusual in his request except that he repeatedly insisted that I hand my monthly plan to by the end of the day. I told him that I would have no problem meeting his request and that I would get back together with him mid- afternoon with my monthly plan. He said that would be fine.


I went back to my office and worked on the monthly plan for about an hour and then took a short lunch break. That afternoon I did some work in the lab and then went back to my office to put some finishing touches on my monthly plan. I added some six month objectives at the end of the plan to let Dr. Jon, the owner, know I knew how to draw up long term objectives.

It was about two PM when I went to Dr. Jon’s office to hand in my work. I was surprised to find his door locked. Since it was still early in the afternoon, I went back to my office and then returned to the lab to do some more work.

Later that afternoon I went back to Dr. John’s office to deliver my plans for the month. Again his office was dark and the door was locked. Finally, I went into the reception area and asked the receptionist if she knew were Dr. Jon was and when he would be back.

“Oh yes,” the receptionist replied. “Dr. Jon left at noon to go on a vacation with his family. He won’t be back until Monday morning.”

I stood there momentarily stunned. The whole request for the monthly plan was nothing more than an orchestrated harassing incident. Dr. Jon had known all along that he wouldn’t be in his office that afternoon or for the next couple of days. The incident was just another of the constant stimulus to my nervous system.

Stress Continues to take its toll

I spent that weekend alone and had almost no contact with anyone else except John Potts and his hired hand.  I tried to avoid the latter since he was uneducated man with very little skills and at times seemed a little strange.  He kept pointing his 410 shotgun at me and kept insisting I take a walk with him in the surrounding woods!  I decided one grave in those woods was enough and stayed in my apartment.

The next week at work, the owner of the company was back in his office.  When I spoke with him, to my surprise he expressed satisfaction with the work I had been doing.  He also informed me that I would now be reporting to a female scientist who had been with the company less than a year.  Of course the woman was the requisite female manager which any government small business loan would demand.  The fact that she was just out of graduate school with no experience in the company product area was not a major consideration.  She accounted for a "minority"  in management on the grant checklist which was critical for any government grant.  I tried to find any company documents written by her and even did a limited search for scientific publications by her without any success.  It seems her primary qualification was that she was a female.

In addition to her apparent lack of qualifications, the female manager provide no guidance or help in my work.  What work I did try to do, was met with passive assistance.  Every time I needed to use a some equipment or an instrument, someone would assist me in a very cursory manner and then act like I should know how to run the specialized instrument.   The instruments were complex and computer operated and required a fair amount of learning and experience to operate properly.  The fact that I was given very little assistance and was made to feel that the operation of the equipment was trivial generated a lot of pressure and self doubt.  However, after years of fascist state torture and belittling, I wasn't at all surprised that I was put in these no-win situations.  My experience told me that expectations in regards to operating the complex scientific equipment was totally unrealistic, and when I did a survey of the personnel at the company, I found very few if any of the scientists had a firm operating knowledge of the equipment.  Yet somehow I was suppose to be able to operate the equipment instantly.

The tremendous, continual stress I was being subjected to again began to take its toll on my physically.  That Wednesday when I left work, I stopped for something to eat and then drove back to my apartment.  I turned the car off and sat there in the car for a few second just relaxing in the sunlight.  Before I knew it, I was sound asleep and didn't wake up until 30 minutes later.  I was so exhausted, I didn't even make it to my apartment without falling asleep.  I also was starting to develop a cough and swelling and soreness in the glands in my neck.  The dread of another bout with bronchitis came over me.

The Olympics and Paranoia

What have we learned from this year’s Olympics?  Well white amerikans can swim and earn multiple gold medals doing the same thing at different/multiple distances.  We also learned that amerika has a lot of good black athletes who can win medals for amerika in non-swimming events. And when americka can’t win an event, the go out and buy the athletes.  Why else would long distant runners from Kenya be attending the U. of Alaska, Anchorage?  For your info., runners from Kenya have won 25 of the last 31(male and female) Boston Marathons and the last 7 men’s Olympic 3000 meters steeplechase.  (7 different men).

The white swimmers will come back to amerika and get lots of adulation and endorsements so they can have money.  The black athletes will have their medals and the basketball players are well paid professionals.  Gymnast Gabby will get endorsements because she is young and a female.  Those are sellable points in amerika.  And finally the average Jane and Joe will bask in thrill of having amerika kicking ass.  And everyone in amerika will think the world is perfect.  I’m just saying there are other ways to look at things and they do make sense.  Remember, Hitler wanted to use the Olympics to showcase his empire and ironically it was a black athlete from amerika, Germany’s successor, that ruined his show.

Back to my story:

The fact that I was denied access to company information about products told me that I wasn’t going to be at my new job very long.  One thing you can count on with amerikans is that you can never underestimate their degree of paranoia.  Why else would so many believe the “weapons of mass destruction” fairy tale?  Of course in my case, the company belief was that I would tell everyone company secrets just like I told everyone about how the 

fascist state tortures innocent citizens.  You can see the correlation, right?

As usual, the telephone was still used to terrorize me.  While I still didn’t have a phone in my apartment (withdrawal, not isolation by terror in fascist terminology), I had to have one at my desk at work.  In one instance, the front office which was quit small, forwarded a call for the other Russell to my office.  I answered the phone and as soon as the caller started talking to me, I knew the party had the wrong person.  I asked the caller who he wanted and he said he had asked for Russell #1 and not me.  I tried to forward the call to Russell #1, but no one answered.  I took the caller’s message and hung up.  The whole incident would have been just a simple  misunderstanding except that when I took the message to Russell #1’s office, I saw him standing in the front office.  He obviously had been there when the call came and the person who took the call was Russell #1’s mother!  The whole incident had been designed to set me off in some tirade so that later, people could say I had acted “crazy”.

That weekend I drove back to Paducah, KY and spent the weekend there. I didn't find any relief there and Ireturned to Rolla on Sunday fatigued and dreading going back to work the next day;

The next day at work the terrorism continued.  Each isolated incidence at work might seem insignificant, but when viewed collectively the result was a well orchestrated conspiracy designed to create mental confusion and failure on my part.  The net result was tremendous mental stress which could then be called schizophrenia and of course any reference to a conspiracy could be called paranoia. John Marks pointed out in his book, "The CIA and Mind Control" stated the following:  "while I was doing research for this book, many people approached me claiming to be the victim of CIA plots.  Although I listend carefully to all and realized that some might be authentic victims, I had no way of distinguishing between someone acting strangely and someone made to act strangely.  Perhaps the most insidious aspect of this technique is that anyone blaming his aberrant behavior on drugs or on the CIA gets labeled a hopless paranoid and his case is thrown into the crank file.  There is no better cover than operating on the edge of madness."  I was being made to act strangely and whoever was behind my torture was operating over the edge of madness.

A typical event at work would involve giving me conflicting directions or answers from the same or different persons at different times.  In one instance I was trying to make a small scale batch of a standard company product. I was told there was no standard written procedure(absurd) and a plant technician gave me a vague process to follow.  The chemical reaction failed when the omission of one of the chemicals was omitted.  That cost me a full days work.

The next day I repeated the reaction and this time Melvina,  a laboratory technician gave me conflicting directions about how to add the ingredients.  Since I was repeatedly told there were no written instructions, the conflicting direction were completely verbal which meant there was no proof to support my version of events.  The whole process was to make this small company appear incompetent like Gamma Supplies had been presented to me when I was initially set up.   The whole scenario infuriated me which was a desired emotional state that my tormentors wanted to create.  And there was nothing I could do about it; like most people, I had to work to survive.